Almost 6 months in

Almost 6 months into being a LPN, I have learned that I true calling was always to nursing but, I keep questioning where my place in nursing is though? When I was a CTRS I worked with troubled teens and developmental disabilities/physical disabilities, I enjoyed that population.  While I was in nursing school, I worked on Med-Surg floor, I enjoyed having "a basket of everything" but, it always short term.  I was able to do a couple of days in the ED setting while in nursing school and I absolutely loved being on the move every second of clinical day.  I have been working as LPN on transitional care unit since September and I love doing what I do as a nurse but, I question everyday if this where my calling/passion is supposed to be.  I never envisioned myself behind a med chart, counting narcs, dealing with dementia patients, and insubordinate  CNAs who have no respect those above them.  I feel like I'm still trying to find my place and feel like I don't know where my place should be because I enjoy med-surg, transitional care, developmental disable, hospice, and ED.  I have learned that I'm truly a night nurse because being on days for any length of time I'm not a happy person, which works for our family in that our older two kidos are in sports and extracurricular activities.  I know that for our family  that being night nurse is what needed because any other position doesn't work.  I guess where do I go from here?  I know most hospital don't hire LPNs, so continue to get my RN in order to be in hospital/acute setting or settle where I'm at and just keep hoping things will change?

Our baby girl 1st XC season

Our daughter decided that she was doing cross country reluctantly because we told that she needs to start thinking forward/to the future (i.e. college, trade school, etc) and those places will be looking for a well rounded person.  She started her amazing journey on the first day of 7th grade, the first Invitational was Wayne where she completed 1.5 miles in 15:38 (10:25/per mile).  It was good start and that's what we told her even though, she was walking at times and we/she knew that she could have ran the entire course but, didn't want to.  Throughout the season, we kept reminding her that she needed to run her own race and not worry about what her teammates were doing.  While they scored as a team, each of their times were individualize.  She learned that she liked wearing spikes for her races because it gave her a little extra.  As the season coming to close, she complained that she was coming down with a chest cold, her being stubborn as I am, refused to give in to it and able to keep it at bay until past Sunday (day after League Championships).  On Saturday, October 26, was her League Championship, she finally learned/accepted to the importance of running her own race and no one else's because she set goal to break 20 minutes for 2 miles, which wasn't unrealistic in that she ran 21:32 the weekend before.  Well, Saturday morning was cool fall morning, i.e. great race weather, well our baby girl "showed up" and finished in 19:02 (8:59/per mile), she finished 38th out of 72 modified girls.  Her team finished overall 3rd out of 7 teams that scored.  I'm beyond proud of her and all her accomplishments this season because while she competed in modified cross country, she maintain on her grades (i.e. honors), and was able of field band.  She gets to enjoy a few weeks before she starts indoor track starts as well as winter guard. 

Nutshell of 4 years

Wow life has really changed in 4 years in many ways but, has stayed the same in others. 

• So in December 2015, I went back to work as per diem Recreation Assistant/Personal Care Assistant at CDR, I worked there in July 2017.  In June 2017, I graduated with a certification as Nursing Assistant (i.e. CNA), began working full time for a LTC in July 2017 and stayed there for a year when I took a job as a PCT (patient care technician) at a hospital closer to home, I also just recently graduated from Nursing School (Practical Nursing), and now licensed as a LPN by NYS BON.  I just started running 3 days a week hoping to work back up to 5-6 days a weeks but, only time will tell on that.
• My husband and I celebrated 16 years of marriage in July, and 17 years of being together.
• My husband took a position as a substitute bus driver for our kids' school district last November, which works well for us because he is off when the kids and was able to be home with them while I was in PN school.  He now works full time for the school district.
• Our oldest son is now in 8th grade, which is so hard to believe because he has made a lot of stride this year as well as some major challenges, i.e. he's a TEENAGER!!!  He still is obsessed with trains and very knowledgeable about all things with locomotives.  He is still in a 6:1:1 classroom but no longer needs to have an aide/assistant assign to him, which we never thought we would see the day where there might be the possibly of him being mainstream into regular classroom (maybe in the next couple of years).
• Our daughter is now in 7th grade, she is developing into amazingly strong, intelligent, kind young woman who is going to participating in field band (as part of the color guard) as well as cross country team.  She has started wearing contacts that has definitely been a challenge for her to use to wearing them but, after almost month she is finally getting the hang of it.  She has been back in public school going on her 3rd year and has maintain being high honor roll.
• Our youngest son is now in 3rd grade, he has definitely met with a lot of challenges academically because he was diagnosed with severe ADHD with a strong possibly of learning disability.  He does enjoy going to school and is also in 6:1:1 program, it definitely is a good fit for his academic needs right now.  He continues to a very lovable boy that absolutely loves his dinosaurs and learning everything he can possibly learn about them.  In 2016, he had a T&A removal surgery (tonsils and adenoids), which helped his hearing abilities but, decreased his issues with snoring. 
• About 4 years ago we added a pit bull/lab mix (she was a rescue dog), she definitely fit right into our crazy crew because she is a spunky dog that loves the kids a lot.

We are still trying to the live life as natural as possible, which I know may sound odd considering I'm  a LPN and my husband a bus driver.

Receiving my license as a Practical Nurse

On September 5th, 2019 New York State Board of Nursing issued my license as a Practical Nurse.  While I already have a bachelor's degree in Therapeutic Recreation with minor of Psychology and had a certification as CTRS as well as CNA, receiving my license was most proudest moments professionally in my life because I felt like I finally arrived.  I feel like I have always been drawn to healthcare and I choose to go into recreation therapy because I felt that I would NOT measure up to my grandmother (my nana) if I went into nursing.  While I enjoyed working in the recreation field and it helped me when we were faced with our oldest son being diagnosis with Autistic as well as a mood disorder, I never felt like it fulfill me because it didn't constantly challenged me.  Now, I have received my license and accepted as a position as a LPN, I feel like I be will challenged and I love that.

"Avocado Eggs"

I love making this dish especially if we need something quick or if we are doing a "breakfast for dinner" night.  It is a bit high in fat, not gonna lie but, avocados are considered "good fats" so, we go with it.


Ingredients:

• 2-4 avocados (depending on how many people you are servings)
• 4-8 large eggs

Optional Ingredients:

• bacon bits
• shredded cheese
• minced garlic
• salt & pepper

Directions:

• Heat the oven to 400 degrees Fahrenheit
• Slice the avocados in half, lengthwise and twist to separate. Remove the pit & scoop out about 2 tablespoons of avocado, creating a larger hole for the egg to sit in. 
• Place the avocado halves into 12" cast iron pan or baking dish, to keep them upright, & then crack one egg on top of each half of the avocado. 
• Bake for 15-20 minutes (i.e. longer you bake them the less "runny" your eggs will be). 

Rochester Marathon

Yesterday, I participated in Rochester Marathon, which was my second marathon.  Even though, I didn't complete all of my goals for it (I had 3 in mind, 1. finished, 2. finish in under 4:10:00, 3. ultimate goal sub - 4 hours), I'm happy with the finish and the time for today.  When I finished the Buffalo Marathon in May, I didn't think that I want to participate in another marathon for a while and yet 2 weeks later I started training for the Rochester Marathon.  I ended up having a total of 17 weeks between marathons.  Training for a Fall Marathon in the heat of the summer prove to be very difficult and extremely frustrating at times especially on long runs.  I'm very thankful for the running groups that I'm a part of to keep me motivated as well as having someone to run with on long runs.  Huge thanks goes to Bill for crewing for me on my long runs because I really don't know if I would have made it on a couple of them without him.  I did have a minor setback towards the end of my training and I really have no one to blame but, myself.  I knew that we had a trip planned to Virginia and I knew that I probably should have done my long run before we went down there but, I figured that I motivated enough to set on track no matter what unfortunately, it wasn't the case and instead of getting the mileage I should have, I settled for a 6 mile run as my long run for that week.  I had a difficult re-adjusting to the elevation change once we got back so basically the last week of August and first week of September were very difficult part of training and really made me question whether or not I was really ready for another marathon.

On Friday afternoon/early evening, I took MacKenna and WES with me to get my packet from Fleet Feet in Rochester.  MacKenna as always had about 20 million questions, WES was interested in the course map and I explained to them where they would be meeting me during the race and then again at the finish line. 
Saturday, I did a shake out type run to basically calm my nerves and I had learned from Buffalo that I needed to run the day before the race in order not to go out too fast.
Sunday, the day of the marathon had arrived.  16 weeks of training and now it was time to race.  I say I was nervous would be a lie because I always get nervous before a race but, this time it wasn't as bad.

The gun for the race went off, I made my way over the start line, I wasn't rushing like I normally do because I kept telling myself that it was just long run and stick to the ratio and I will be fine.  I went out in 9:06 pace, which for me in "race mode" (as Bill puts) was conservative for me.  At 5.5 miles up through mile 7.25 was a steady climb then it was downhill until mile 9, where there was another uphill climb that lasted until mile 13, hardest part was from mile 9 to mile 10.5 at which my body wasn't liking it but, I reminded myself the Bill and the kids would meeting at mile 13.5 to switch out my water bottles.  When I reminded myself of that I got a little emotionally because at the point my average pace was 9:08 meaning that I was on my way to reach my ultimate goal of sub - 4 hours in my 2nd marathon.  I continued on with my run 4 mins and jog/walk 30 secs, which I felt like I could really maintain for the entire race.  I pass through the second relay stop seeing some of Rochester MRTT mamas, who cheered me on and said I was looking amazing, I finally got where Bill and the kids were we trade off my bottles and as I ran away from them I got a little emotionally knowing that it was first time that the kids really were getting to see mommy in the thick of race and how much time that I spend away from them to do my training and hoping that it inspires them to never give up even when you like it would be easier thing to do.  I was feeling great and still maintaining my pace/speed that I wanted until about mile 21 because there was a climb that started just before mile 17 and ended mile 21 at which my doubt in my head was telling me that "you know your body is tired and you are wet from the rain, this isn't worth the pain you are going to be in later."  So, I let my head get in the way, which unfortunately cause to me to slow my pace/speed by quite a bit, I went from maintaining a 9:08 to 9:10 pace down to 9:14 then pace down 9:23 (which up being overall pace for the race).  I went from run 4 and jog/walk 30 secs to run 3:30 mins and walk 1 minute, which I was very upset with myself and beating myself over it.  It wasn't until mile 24, which I was get it back together and telling my doubt in my head that I trained too hard for this give up my goal now.  Then I started picking up the pace again, went back to run 4 mins and walk 30 secs even though, my doubt kept trying to get me to listen to it, my determination to finish under 4:10:00 was winning the battle, then hit mile 25 and last water stop and hearing them say you only got 1.2 miles left, my body was like lets get this done and I got this.  Again, I started to pick up the pace knowing that 1.2 miles was easy and I could do it.  Hit mile 26, and heard someone only 2 blocks left (ie just around the corner) and again my body was like get it done.  I rounded corner and heard the cheers for me, hear my name being announced as spotted Bill and the kids, all I wanted to was cry.  I crossed the finish line and went to get my medal and realizing that I missed out on my sub 4 hour goal but, I finished in 4:06:53 (chip time) and that was pretty amazing for my second marathon in a year.  I found afterwards that I was 7th of 32 for my age group and I finished 182th out of 543 finisher.

Summer in a nutshell

It has been a crazy summer to say the least, between homeschooling, races, trip to Virginia for a wedding, and Bill starting a new job with the union.
July:

• Started up with homeschooling for MacKenna and Scott
• I continued my training for my 2nd marathon as well as running streak
• MacKenna and I participated in Color Run with our friends Nicky and Mikey
• Bill, Nicky, and I participated in our first 10K at the end of the month, which I took 1st place for age group 

 August:

• Did some tough long runs with my friend Tara and thanks Bill/the kids for crewing for us
• Continued with homeschooling 
• Traveled to Virginia for Scott and Vicki's wedding

September:

• Continued with homeschooling
• WES went back to his BOCES program 
• I completed my second marathon